When I started this process in early 2004 I wanted surgery so that I would lose weight and cure my high blood pressure and not die. That is really all I thought about at the time. I NEVER even realized how much of life I had been missing, nor how much of myself I had been covering up with all of the excess weight. I am a very structured person. I want to set a goal, achieve it, and then move on the next one, etc, etc, etc, ad infinitum. Weight loss surgery certainly did not fit into my nice little box of structure.
It became Sandi’s Banded Living Wild Ride and could very well have been featured at an amusement park near you. Who would have thought that I would wind up in the gym 5-7 days a week? Who would have thought I would even attempt hiking down to the 7 sacred pools when we wound up in Hana on the island of Maui? Who would have thought I would ever put on a wet suit and BCD (Buoyancy Compensator Device) and go on a night dive, or bicycle the Pacific Coast Highway, or even walk down to the beach and stroll for hours? Who would have thought I would have muscles in my arms and shoulders at age 63 that younger women admired and wanted for themselves? Who would have thought I would walk into a senator’s office in Washington DC and speak my mind about including treatment for obesity as part of the essential health benefits package in health care reform, or speak to groups of weight loss surgery patients sharing my story, my successes and my tips for using my lap band tool to maximum results? Who would have thought I would write a book, operate a web page, both full of amazingly important information for the millions of people who deal with the disease of obesity every day of their lives? Who would have thought I would bare my soul in articles and blogs about my adventures on Sandi’s Banded Living wild ride? Not me, Nope, not this woman who spent most of her life as the fat kid, the fat girl, the fat woman, hiding in jobs that provided her the opportunity to do telephone sales so nobody would have to see her.
BUT, HERE I AM and I’m loving every minute of it because I am right where I belong. I started out with what was a tremendous goal for me; to lose enough weight to resolve my high blood pressure, and to LIVE. Check, those goals were achieved within less than 6 months of my surgery. New and exciting things just continued to happen, and that motivated me to keep on so that more new and exciting things could and did continue to happen. Suddenly I was 250 pounds lighter, swimming at the gym, talking in front of prospective weight loss surgery patients and wanting more because I had energy, was healthy and felt fully alive for the first time in many years.
Let’s start with goals:
These were reassessed and changed somewhere along the journey to:
Looking at that right now, 8 years after surgery, this is what my goals have morphed into:
Now let’s look at bucket lists.
When I first climbed on to Sandi’s Banded Living Wild Ride I didn’t really have a bucket list. I had thoughts of a few things I might like to do if I could. You know what I mean, these were wishes, maybe even dreams, but I am pretty sure I didn’t believe in my ability to make them happen. Soon things started happening:
The world started opening up for me and many more wonderful things started happening. Many of you have read about them on the web site or in my blog posts.
What are some of the items added to my bucket list that still go unfulfilled but WILL happen:
Lofty and noble items on my bucket list, wouldn’t you say? Several are in the works and all will come to fruition if I have any say in the matter, which, of course I do.
Last, but certainly not least are NSV’s (non scale victories). When we have lap band, or any type of weight loss surgery for that matter, it is very easy to become fixated on a number and nothing else. That would be the number on the scale today. It’s not enough! It’s never been enough. We need to be thankful each and every day for this miracle we have been given and celebrate ALL of our successes. These range from tying our shoelaces, wrapping a towel around us, not needing a seat belt extender on a plane to fitting in the rides at amusement parks, no longer having to shop in the big girl’s or big boy’s stores, having someone take a second look at us as we walk buy, or sometimes just having a significant “other” at our side beaming with pride at how good we look. NSV’s come at the most unexpected time and continue to happen to me even 8 years post op. Personally, I hope they never stop, since they are that part of me who is thankful for this miracle of a second chance at life that I have been granted looking for the little things to celebrate that life.
Keep reworking your goals, crossing off and then adding more to your bucket lists and celebrating your NSV’s. Remember, it’s all about LIVING!