I know you all get tired of hearing me say I am 9 years post op and 7 years in maintenance but there it is again for what it's worth!  Looking back at a 424 pound woman who could barely walk from her car into a doctor's appointment I realize just how much my mindset has changed as I make the choices that have changed my life.  These are the choices that allow me to go hiking, biking, scuba diving and vacationing all over the world.  These are the changes that will keep my flexible and in good health for years to come, and at 64 years young, that is of great import to me.  These are the changes that allow me to shop in normal size stores, to have fun cooking with basic ingredients and coming up with new taste delights for my family.  These are the changes that have lit up my life with the knowledge that what I want to do is give back to this weight loss surgery community that gave me back my life.

It's important for me to understand that this has been a total progression of mindset alterations so that if I get derailed by life I choose a healthy alternative path, not a previously unhealthy one.  Why am I in this semi-maudlin state today?  What has interfered?  You all may laugh at me, and I am actually smiling at myself as I gain this insight, feel it and work through it.  I have just been to the doctor's office where a minor procedure was done to remove a benign cyst.  How can something so small throw me into upset?  Well, it began when I realized I now have an open "wound" on my side.  Hmm, swimming in a public pool with an open wound????  That's right!  No lap swimming for about 1-2 weeks.  That just threw me into panic.  I started hyperventilating as I thought the following:

• I have to swim, if I don't I will gain weight
• I can't walk, my knees will not tolerate it without alternating with swim one day, walk or elliptical or bike the next
• I will not have the peace that an hour of swimming affords to me
• I'll never make it through this

Okay, are you done laughing yet?  These are some of the excuses I would have used in a previous life to give me permission to drown my upset in say.....a box of cookies, or maybe a bag of chips, or even a pizza.  But not today.  Not nine years post-op.

I suddenly realized that the numbing medication the doc had injected into the area had adrenaline in it and my mind was racing around in a panic stage.  All I had to do was breathe, and then breathe some more, and then step back for a second and look at what was going on.

Who was I kidding?  I can certainly walk for a week or two, or bicycle for a week or two and if I don't burn quite as many calories there is surely another way to deal with it...don't ingest quite as many calories.  Easy solution when your mindset is in the appropriate place.